Encouraging Words Newsletter

Building Connecting Relationships

Creating a saner, simpler life


April 24, 2005

Welcome to Encouraging Words monthly newsletter. You have subscribed because you want encouragement in creating a saner, simpler life. Please pass it along to friends who could use these tips.


1. Welcome and What's New
2. Article: Building Connecting Relationships
3. Resources
4. Self-Care Tips
5. Relationship Tips
6. Subscription and Copyright Info

We had a terrific spring break, as you can see from the pictures: http://encouragingwords.blogspot.com/2005/04/spring-break.html

For those of you who asked when my health plan would be finished, I am happy to announce it is here! I will be posting at the messageboard as I go through this plan for a second time. I plan on starting today (Monday) and would love for others to join me.


I am looking at changing the format of this newsletter. I would love your input so I give you what you want. It's a quick one question poll you can go to here:




Strategy #7 for a Saner, Simpler Life: Building Connecting Relationships

"The human contribution is the essential ingredient. It is only in the giving of oneself to others that we truly live." ~ Ethel Percy Andrus

Our relationships can be one of the most complicated parts of our lives. But, we make them more complicated when we don’t say what we mean, try to read their thoughts instead of asking questions and worry more about appearances than intimacy.

Simplifying Connecting

· Have a regular time to call or write. Call your parents every Sunday. There will be less phone tag, if you call people on a certain day and they are expecting it. Have a regular monthly date with a friend. That way you don’t have to constantly try to schedule meeting with your friends.

· Be direct with people. So much time is wasted from misunderstanding just because people are not saying exactly what is on their minds. Tell people what you want, what you need, what you are feeling. Don’t expect people to read your mind and don’t assume you know what other people are thinking.

· Be there in the moment with people. Listen to them. Connect. Don’t be thinking about your to do list. Don’t spend your time worrying about what you will say next. Enjoy who they are now.

· Don’t give out your cell phone or beeper number to everyone. You do not need to be available 24 hours a day. · Put people first. As Victoria Moran says, “things with a heartbeat come first”.

· Once a week on desk day, write all your letters and once a week a catch up on e-mails.

· Don’t talk to people about how “busy” you are. Think if you are trying to get your self-worth from busyness.

· Often a complicated life stems from not being yourself consistently. It can be tiring to dress to impress, to be Lil Miss Perfect, to remember which “white” lie you told. To live with integrity means to live your life outwardly the same as you are inside. It means what you show to others is who you really are. You are consistently honest.

· Admit when you make a mistake. Then fix it. How many times have you stretched the truth a bit to get out of looking bad? That dishonesty drains energy, while admitting mistakes yields closer relationships and the ability to make things right.

· Don’t make excuses to yourself or others.

Action Plan

In what ways are you not in integrity in regards to your relationships? What bad relationship habits to you have? What changes can you make?

___ Plan your time to catch up on letters and e-mails

“If I could give you one thought, it would be to lift someone up. Lift a stranger up -- lift her up. I would ask you, mother and father, brother and sister, lovers, mother and daughter, father and son, lift someone. The very idea of lifting someone up will lift you, as well.” ~Maya Angelou

@ 2003, 2004 Beth Dargis

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The Simplicity Ecourse

Frugal Dates

Get Together With a Friend



I am taking the 70 Day Challenge right now and I just love it. The challenge has fresh ideas and step by step ways to get your life together.

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or go straight to the challenge: http://www.changeyourlifechallenge.com/


Self-Care Tips for March:

  • Eat no fast food this week
  • Worry less - pray, journal, talk with positive friends
  • Eat some fresh, spring asparagus steamed then sautéed with butter, sea salt and lemon pepper
  • Notice your rhythms - when you are energetic, introspective, and most joyful

"There is so much good in the worst of us, and so much bad in the best of us, that it ill behaves any of us to find fault with the rest of us." ~ James Truslow Adams


Relationship Ideas for March:

  • Accept someone as they are
  • Turn off the TV for TV turn off week Apr 24-May 1
  • Appreciate 5 people a day
  • Be kind to someone grumpy

"Nature gave us one tongue and two ears so we could hear twice as much as we speak." ~Epictetus

I encourage you this month to smell a flower, feel the grass, and listen to those you love.


Beth Dargis
The Encouraging Coach


A Note About My Recommendations: I provide links in this newsletter to products and services I am offering or I have personally found valuable. I have an affiliate agreement with some of the products I like.

Copyright (c) 2005 Beth Dargis, Zeeland, Michigan.  All rights reserved. You may use these articles on your website and newsletters as long as the footer is included. Permission is granted to reproduce, copy or distribute this e-letter so long as this copyright notice and full information attributing Beth Dargis is attached.

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